Would Adoption Exist in a Perfect World?

This question was recently asked on an adoption forum and the resulting comments stunned me. Although I have learned a great deal about adoptive mothers, I discovered that I still have much to learn. Though hopefully, I just happened to wonder into a hornets nest of exceptionally nasty, super sensitive and mean-spirted adoptive moms. Having seen the path of destruction that losing children to adoption has wreaked on so many of my birth mom and adoptee friends, I ventured that in a perfect world, adoption would not exist. A perfect world to me implies a fantasy idea - not something that would ever be reality. Perfection does not exist in my mind. I naively ventured that I had trouble believing that any woman would intentionally choose to adopt if she could give birth (That was interpreted as calling any women who said that was a liar). Now, some women give birth and then adopt, and that I understand. Secondary infertility is common. Some women adopt rather than giving birth a second time intentionally as they feel there are so many children who need homes. Other women give up after many miscarriages and/or ivf; that's not hard to believe either. In my perfect fantasy world, I said that adoption would not exist. "There would be no need," I said, as in my perfect fantasy world any woman who wanted a baby could give birth. Every baby born would by design; unplanned pregnancies would not exist. I had no idea, however, that apparently it is not uncommon for women to adopt, and never attempt to give birth. Several fertile adoptive moms popped up and blew a gasket at me for implying that "adoption was second best", that "adoptive moms did not love their children as much", that I was calling these women "liars". None of which I said, believe or remotely implied. I said I found it hard to believe that a infertile woman would say that she was glad that she was infertile for any reason. The moderator cursed at my audacity for calling her a liar (I certainly did not), then 3, 4, 5 other adoptive moms pointed out they too were adopting even though they were not infertile. They just think adoption is so swell - and apparently care not a whit about birth parents. A few said in their perfect worlds adoption would exist, otherwise they'd be deprived of the children they had adopted. Even in a "perfect" world, they want/need adoption. Huh? Does that show how much concern they have for birth parents? They want to get babies somewhere else even if they can give birth, and care not about the woman whose baby they want. So freaking shoot me, I had no idea that so many women actually think adoption is better than giving birth. Silly me, I thought most women who want to parent want to give birth! I thought for most women adoption was not their first choice. Dang, I do have a lot to learn. Ah, what did I learn from this volley of vicious assaults? I learned that denial is not exclusive to birth mothers. I learned that some adoptive moms are angry, hypersensitive and nasty, mean-spirted women. Aren't we birth moms supposed to be the angry ones? Heck, if I were infertile, I think I might be angry about it. I cannot fathom that a woman who wants to parent would choose adoption over giving birth first - anymore than I believe that most birth mothers are happy that they relinquished their babies as it made their lives so much easier and better.