Sharon Stone - With Foot in Mouth

You gotta love this one! STONE IS HONEST ABOUT ADOPTION Actress SHARON STONE refuses to hide her two children's adoption from them, and will tell baby son LAIRD as soon as he is old enough to understand. Stone adopted five-year-old son ROAN with ex-husband PHIL BRONSTEIN, and went on to add to her brood, last May (05), after their divorce. The BASIC INSTINCT actress insists adopted parents have a deeper connection with their children than biological parents. She says, "Roan already knows he's adopted and Laird will learn as soon as he's able to comprehend it. I have a bunch of friends who also have adopted children. And we jokingly refer to all the poor mothers who just have birth children - they don't know what it really means to have a child pick you and you pick them. There's kind of cosmic intensity about it. Our kids look so much more like us than birth children look like their parents." 09/02/2006 17:17 Here's the link for this story, in case you think I just dreamed it up! Nah, couldn't have come up with anything this absurd. http://www.contactmusic.com/new/xmlfeed.nsf /mndwebpages/stone%20is%20honest%20about%20adoption_09_02_2006# Gee, isn't that swell of Sharon Stone to be so "honest" with her adopted children? She refuses? Like someone was trying to force her to hide the fact of her children's adoptions. Uh, wouldn't that be pretty dang hard for her to do since their adoptions have been splashed all over the news since day 1 since she first bought, er, I mean adopted them? "Deeper Connection?" Uh, yeah sure, right!!!!! Wait, is this the same actress who left her sleeping child in the limo so she could go hang out with a man for awhile? The child wasn't alone I don't believe - think the limo driver was there with it. "Joking refers to all the poor mothers who just have birth children?" "Cosmic Intensity?" WTF? Is she stupider than I even imagined she was?

Busted!

Okay, ladies, and the occasional guy, I just want to warn you, I can't do any more adoption stuff at work. I work in a two person office - just the attorney and me, so, it's pretty tricky, okay, it is virtually impossible, to blend in and subtlely work on my adoption projects at work. Today, my boss, who is one of the world's kindest men on earth, warned me for the second time, not to work on anymore adoption stuff at work. He needs me to concentrate on the legal work, the nerve of him, huh? Soooo, I'm going to have to listen to him this time, curtail my adoption projects until either lunchtime or after work. Just wanted to mention it in case, I am slower to post and slower to respond to emails. I have a recommendation for you all (opps, my Southern roots popping out)! If you haven't read Manuela's Blog today, on How Wealthy People Adopt, the I highly suggest that you check it out! Bet you'll love it as much as I did. http://www.manuela.blogs.com/

Another New Momma!

Just wanted to alert you all that we have two new ring members, HeatherRainbow, and Let me Take Your Hands to welcome! HR has two posts up already, an Introduction and a lovely poem. LMTYH has been blogging awhile! So when you get a chance, I hope you will say hi to both our new to the ring moms! http://heatherrainbow.blogspot.com/ http://www.zoeesmommy.typepad.com/ Also, I would like some feedback from you all - I'm excited that we are growing and want to encourage some other moms to join us. Plus, I would like to keep letting people know about us too as much as possible. Before I force ahead though, does anyone have any concerns about privacy and becoming TOO well known? I know some of you are in open adoptions - and don't want to cause any problems for anyone. So, let me know what you think! I think the greater our numbers, the more we have some ability to maybe change hearts and minds - and help people to understand us and adoption better!

Wraith's Challenges

Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It is the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.

Virginia Satir

Wraith, my good buddy's latest blog entry brings up a very significant issue for woman who have placed/relinquished children to adoption. I often speak of the adoption therapist that I saw faithfully during my first year of reunion as I learned a great deal from her. Her perspective as an an adoptee was invaluable in helping me understand my son during early reunion. During one session she asked me this question: "Who do you blame the most for losing your son?" With no hesitation, I responded, "Myself". She smiled, nodded her head and said that was good, that it was a positive sign that I accepted the main share of the responsibility. Society's warped ideas of adoption and my husband greatly influenced my decision, but, I was of age and therefore feel that I must accept the blame. Consider this, when a young pregnant woman seeks help with a crisis pregnancy, here's what I feel should occur:

• First, we explore the option to parent, and give her as many resources as possible to let her know that she can parent if she wishes to. Not only do we encourage and support her, but, we honestly present parenting to her with its drawbacks and joys. We acknowledge the importance of keeping babies and mothers together.
• Next, if she considers abortion, we honestly provide her with the REAL pros and cons. We avoid the use of scare tactics or religious dogma to make her feel as though abortion is the devil's work and will doom her to hell and make her a murderer;
• If she wants to explore adoption, we explain to her that adoption carries with it lifelong consequences for child and parent and all their family members as well. We present the pros and cons of adoption in a brutally honest manner.
• We give her real viable options, support and encourage her to make the best possible choice based on real, complete and valid information.
• We resist the temptation to tell her what is "for the best" and do not judge her or try to convince her to do what we feel is "right". She must live with the decision that she makes so, it must be one that she can live with best.

Then, we step back and let HER make the decision.

Many birth moms of my generation may have had choices, but, not REAL valid choices based on accurate information or much, if any, support and encouragement. Some question that a choice without adequate and complete information and valid resources is not really much of a choice at all. And I see some merit in that opinon. I am not disagreeing with Wraith though - I think we must own up to our part in losing our children - unless we were underage and totally with no control. Even then, we still have some responsibilty to own up to.

I have no pat answers - but, I do believe that pregnant women in crisis pregnancies deserve to be provided with more choices, valid information and be treated with a great deal more respect.

Check out Wraith's post on Denial - it's very thought-provoking, honest and well worth checking out! http://wraithsblog.blogspot.com/2006/02/denial.html